i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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