haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Let's paint friendship bongs
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Randomize