You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
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