Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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