so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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