I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize