When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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