i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize