Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Is her dick bigger than yours?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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