I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
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