Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
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