We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I'm bleeding and have questions
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize