I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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