sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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