Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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