absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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