i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
