the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
