Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  "You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB

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  (313): "You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB http://tfl.nu/8qh8
  Replies (4) Good night (1065) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I think I just got seasick

  (409): View more from Texas

  you're not on a boat

  (408): View more from California

  he has a waterbed.

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  (408): I think I just got seasick (409): you're not on a boat (408): he has a waterbed. http://tfl.nu/239c
  Replies (7) Good night (1458) Bad night (641)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?

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  (513): The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU? http://tfl.nu/gpmz
  Replies (8) Good night (589) Bad night (3351)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"

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  (812): just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer" http://tfl.nu/i06z
  Replies (29) Good night (1181) Bad night (9609)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon

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  (561): I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon http://tfl.nu/z2jl
  Replies (21) Good night (4881) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.

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  (303): You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat. (1-303): ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent. http://tfl.nu/2smi
  Replies (17) Good night (12741) Bad night (1751)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...

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  (757): hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found... http://tfl.nu/titb
  Replies (16) Good night (9933) Bad night (1175)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock

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  (856): Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock http://tfl.nu/vedt
  Replies (7) Good night (1385) Bad night (842)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  I'm trying to make a sex playlist

  (916): View more from California

  record yourself crying and put it on a loop.

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  (510): I'm trying to make a sex playlist (916): record yourself crying and put it on a loop. http://tfl.nu/f4y5
  Replies (12) Good night (3369) Bad night (1314)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.

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  (425): We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party. http://tfl.nu/nzty
  Replies (5) Good night (1775) Bad night (962)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS

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  (859): well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS http://tfl.nu/hivl
  Replies (4) Good night (1307) Bad night (550)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.

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  (248): Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation. http://tfl.nu/s4gv
  Replies (7) Good night (1337) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!

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  (479): That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?! http://tfl.nu/832w
  Replies (2) Good night (792) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?

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  (405): Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50? http://tfl.nu/w6wp
  Replies (6) Good night (1187) Bad night (303)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back

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  (505): It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back http://tfl.nu/ajiv
  Replies (1) Good night (244) Bad night (446)

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