I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Randomize
