i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Randomize