She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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