And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.