I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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