I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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