is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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