you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
