im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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