I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
