i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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