she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
