Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.