I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.