i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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