you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
