we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Everyone says I win the strip club
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize