when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
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