just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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