Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
