official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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