Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize