I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
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I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
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Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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