are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize