im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
