After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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