I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
