Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
smell my finger.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize