I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
