Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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