Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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