ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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