Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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